Dear Dating in 2016,
You’re the worst.
Oh, but I’m not done. You see I’m what “they” call a millennial, but NOT the same kind of millennial as that youngest Kardashian who has had so much plastic surgery she looks like Cruella De Vil…that’s a 101 Dalmatians reference for you young ones reading this.
I digress. So I graduated in 2005, I’ve been in the workforce for 10 years, I have a child (cutest five-year-old you’ve ever met), I own a home and a car, have a 401k, oh and did I mention I’m divorced. Yeah, there’s that too.
So rewind 10 years ago when I was leaving the comforts of college life (never do it) and ventured for the West coast to seek love and adventure. It was a time of freedom, fun and MySpace, yup MySpace. (Where are you Tom?) Social media was just beginning to form and Nokia phones with interchangeable color buttons were a thing. It was a beautiful time. People drove without texting, they used their phones as phones, conversations in grocery stores were shared, if something funny happened and you missed it, you missed it. It was real life.
And dating was real. So I’ll confess, dating in my twenties was cut short due to that time I got married and played house in Mississippi, but from what I remember, dating was far, far from what I’m now experiencing in my thirties. Here are some observations, clarifications, ramifications for your entertainment and education.
Texting can be great for those instances where I screen my mom’s call and can respond to her forty questions with a simple text, but by no means is texting the way to get to know someone.
I’m guilty for sure of only texting with a guy from the beginning stage of “getting to know him”, but guess what? It only goes so far. Talk. On the phone. Old school like the days when you had call waiting and feared your mom would pick up the landline from the kitchen. Use your phone as a phone. Just try it. I dare you.
And then maybe meet in person and make eye-contact while you’re talking…the horror I know. But from this side of divorce, trust me, communication is key sure, but what is more is the tone and body language that goes along with those words.
These things did not exist ten years ago and I wish they didn’t exist now. It is harder to meet someone new as you get um older, but in my experience you will not swipe right on your husband using a dating app and here is some dating app lingo to help you understand.